This is one I've just started working on. It's been in my head on each bike ride -- and yet doesn't feel quite right to me. Suggestions would be most welcome.
Ray

Age of Enlightenment draft 2

Eratosthenes, a Greek astronomer, determined that the earth was a sphere and calculated its rough circumference in the third century BC. By the 15th century, most educated people in Europe had abandoned the notion that the Earth is flat.

Enlightenment on the matter only came to me this week when I purchased a silver bicycle with narrow tires that had the look of being very fast. But nothing in my prairie city, as it turns out, is flat. Even small inclines constrain my speed to just above a slow walk.

I can't be blamed for not knowing. Mostly I've viewed my city through the windows of airplanes and cars, whereas many ancients lived near an ocean where they could see ships approaching, the mast top appearing first. Here, there are no sailing ships, just mile high clouds floating by, but not appearing cloud top first.

My second enlightenment came when two kids peddled past on an uphill, gleefully sounding their warning bells and yelling "You're almost there!" It's likely they had the top of the hill in mind, but I couldn't help but think of the end of the line. 

As for the third enlightenment ...

downhill race--
neck to neck
with a jackrabbit

Comments

[Aurora]

I feel funny commenting on haibun when I've only written three and only had one published. However, I like this one so much, I'll add my paltry two cents:

Paragraph 3 can be left out in its entirety, as well as the phrase, "My second enlightenment". Instead, I would change it to "My enlightenment was furthered when...." And I would entirely take out "As for the third enlightenment" because I think it's inferred and thusly, needn't be stated.

All that said, I like the concept behind this one a lot, and that haiku is dynamite.

[Yu Chang]

Hate to agree wiht Aurora again!

If the word "enlightenment" appears in the title, I would try to
avoid using it again in the prose, if possible.
The haiku is definitely a zinger.

Me too, feel funny commenting on your haibun, since I've only
written two so far.

[Ray Rasmussen]

Thanks folks. You shouldn't discount your opinions. You're all good readers and a haibun should work for all readers, not just for writers of haibun. And, those are good suggestions.
Ray

[janet lynn davis]

thanks for posting this and other haibuns for us.

[Robert]

I enjoyed this as well.